Changes...

Time keeps flying by... Each time I pick Tucker up from a nap, I swear he's gotten bigger! Tucker had his four month shots two weeks ago. The shots were painful (for me) as always. Dr. Williams  says he's developing wonderfully. He is still very small, only weighing 9 pounds, 8 ounces. Although she says she is not concerned about his small stature at all, I informed her that we were having some feeding problems and she said she'd like to see us back in two weeks (today). Over the last two weeks, because of our feeding problems, I put Tucker on formula. I had mixed emotions about doing so, but now that I have done it, I know it is what is best for him. I always said that I would only nurse as long as it was what was best for my baby. So, when it wasn't what was best anymore, I knew I had to give it up. Thankfully, Tucker has done fairly well adjusting to the bottle. 

This has been my last full week before returning to work. I have my moments of sadness where I just don't know how I'm going to be away from him during the day. Thankfully, Tucker will be staying with my very best friend, Brandi, who is an amazing person. Brandi will love him and kiss him and hold him and tell him how much his mommy loves him every day. I'm much more worried about me than I am about him. Returning to work was a difficult decision to make. In the end, I know that my return to work is what is best for us as a family. It has been the hardest decision I've ever had to make because it feels like there isn't a "right" choice. Because I'm returning to work soon, I've spent time this week printing all our digital photos of Tucker out and working with my dear friend Susan on Tucker's scrapbooks. As I look back through pictures of the last four months I cannot believe the time has gone by so quickly and that my tiny baby is growing into a little boy. As each stage of his growth and development ends and a new one begins, I have found it bittersweet. There are things I've been happy to see go (such as the two weeks of refusing to sleep anywhere besides my bed) and plenty of things I've been sad to say "goodbye" to (such as nursing). However, as each stage ends, a new one begins and Tucker amazes me with something new. He's recently learned to roll from his back to his stomach! He has also learned that he can make his voice go really loud and it will get everyone's attention! However, by far my favorite thing he is doing right now is learning to take his pacifier in and out of his mouth. When it's in, he has no trouble finding it to take it out. However, when he takes it out, he sticks it in a thousand places on his face before finding his mouth LOL! It's the best thing I get to watch all day! I love it! I never thought that something that simple would warm my heart and entertain me so much. 

We are headed to the doctor in a little while. Hopefully, Tucker has grown a lot in the last two weeks. He's also been on reflux medicine because his doctor thinks he may have some reflux because of his stuffy nose. However, it doesn't seem to have made much of a difference so we'll see what she has to say about that as well today. After Tucker's appointment, he is going to stay at Brandi's house for a little while and my mother and I are going to go to my classroom to finish up there so I will be away from Tucker for most of the day today. Tonight, as every Friday night, is Tucker's night to stay with my mom and dad (Nonnie and Poppie) so I will be missing my little boo tonight.